AEPA.....

I got my AEPA results today.......

and................


welllll.............

I passed them both with flying colors.


What does this mean now? Jack shit.
At least I know I can do it.



My life took an interesting turn last night. Old Faithful called around midnight. Then proceeded to hang up because he thought I said I was in bed with someone, when in fact I just said I was in bed (alone, of course). So after we fought for an hour about that.... he told me to come to NC. Today. Every fear I have, he has an answer to. Every doubt it's the right thing to do, he has a convincing arguement. I am super torn. He said "I think we are both at the point in our lives where we just need to say 'fuck it' and give each other a fair chance. This is the first time in 4 years we have both been single at the same time. Enough wondering what could have been, its time for it to happen." Really??? He wants us to set out on some great adventure together. End up in NY, Hawaii, or Cali. He's got job offers in those places... and said I could pick. Scary.

Am I really going to fly across the country tonight, to give love a shot? My heart is still aching from the last masacre it suffered.... I just don't know if I'm ready. Its scary and exciting all at the same time. I can't imagine the look on Jess and Nicoles faces if I were to show up at the Far Less show and surprise them.

He is waiting to hear back from me so he can book my ticket. I wish I had some clear sign telling me to take a leap of faith, or stay put and be responsible. My mother is no help.... when I first called her she said she thinks I should stay in AZ and work on finding a new career, then she said..... "Well you keep trying to lay dwon roots, but things just don't seem to work out for you, first with the job, then with Nick.... maybe all that happened because Marco is who you're supposed to end up with and this is fates way of pushing you two together." For my mother to say something like that is just crazy!! She is the grounded one, she shouldnt be tempting me like this! Ahh.

Looks like I've got some serious thinking to do.... if I fall off the radar for a week it's because I left the state.....